I was planning to remake Al, because a 19dex wizard really isn’t that impressive.

So I pottered about doing all those things that you do, such as preparing a mule to transfer your stuff to, and redeeming all those quest items. One of my items was the Hero Medal, or whatever you call it, from the Maple History Book quest. So I was planning a trip to Victoria. I was in the FM at the time, so I ran my way up to Orbis with the help of speed pills, my Red Whip and Teleport. All went well, with the exception of a short skirmish with the penguins, right up till the point where I reached Orbis station.

It was 10:58.

So I do the whole dramatic screaming thing, and run through the halls and corridors of lovely Orbis Station, screaming, “AAAAAAAAAHGAWDDON’TLEAVEWITHOUTMEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASE”.

Of course, in a tragic cliche-style thing, I missed the ship. So I spent the next 10 minutes being emo.

Stuff happened. I traded fame with a bandit and was invited to a guild. The ship came; I clicked on it and got on.

Then a black screen hits me, followed by the startup screen and a window that says, “The connection to the server has ended. No, we don’t care if you waste all your money. We get such a kick out of doing this.”

t(‘_’o)

The whole process repeats itself. I buy another ticket, I go back to the platform and wait. I spend some time trying to decipher a Spanish conversation between two people with my rudimentary Spanish/French skills, and all I learned was that one of them was from Mexico. I also made a lvl31 hunter jealous with my sexy Red Whip. The ship came, so I got on it, then I went AFK to get some chocolate.

I return and there’s a tombstone with Allamar’s name on it and her ghost giving me that cool, ‘you’re an idiot and this just proves it’ look from above it. Oh, and a great big flyin’ skull-bat-chicken with its pimp ship flapping around and being generally evil.

t(‘_’t)

Attempt no. 3. All goes fairly well. I meet up with some nice people. There are two fizards (including myself), two clerics, a lizard, and a hunter with this wolf mask on. So (logically speaking) we take the most rational course of action.

CLERIC VS FIZARD ARROW WAR!!

I still say we pwned those clerics, man.

The hunter attempts to hit on the female cleric and fails badly. No balrogs, so we go for a walk around the ship. It’s nice, and we’re just about to hit Sixtopia, when:

The connection to the server has ended. Please try again.

OHMFG. t(x_xt)

In a fit of furstration, I surrender and turn my attentions to my mule. I’m in the process of deciding that she should be another backup character (one with a magician build closer to what the guides recommend), but then I realise that she has 7 str and 5 dex. RESTART!

When choosing the eyes, I realise that Al has the brown eyes from pre-contact-lenses patch, which you can’t get without paying any more. Screw it, I say, let Al be. I’ll go down in history as the only wizard to make it that far with 19 dex. So then I make a new character, and name her after a country. Because all my magician characters are named after countries. Countries of my own making, of course, up until the point where I take over the world and rename England Allamar and France Nairen-

You saw nothing. <.<

ANYWAY! I get a pretty decent roll within the first five minutes. It’s a 5 dex/str, 11 int. The only drawback is 4 luk. Oh well, I can deal with that. So off Nairen goes, hitting those snails for 1 and 2 damage (reaching 20int at lvl3.). I finish all the Maple Island quests that I am able and head off to Vic, grab some more experience from Olaf, and abruptly realise that I need 20% more experience.

Then begins the long and agonizing process of killing things 1 damage at a time. This is the perfect moment, of course, for a higher-level to zip past me using Teleport. I tracked her down and killed her mother. But it turned out to be just a nightmare. The pumpkin slimes, though, are phenomenally cute. I want to eat one. Whole. >D

This leads to a rather unfortunate experience; I head over to Henesys, the Maple Island of…Victoria Island, to kill some snails, shrooms etcetera. I find a Green Snail on a platform. Warily, I head over to kill it. The next thing I know, I’m being flanked by an Orange Mushroom and a Pumpkin Slime. Which I just accidentally hit. What is this, the MapleStory Mafia? How come even Green Snails can afford bodyguards?! This leads to a narrow brush with death; luckily, not too narrow.

Back to slugging for me. This is easily the worst spate of training I’ve been through, excepting the time when I had to go on that cabbage diet and drag those huge rocks up that hill…

Oops. Ignore that.

In the process, I also ‘borrow’ 30k from the Al fund, to fund Nairen. I’m sure that once Nai grows into her own, she’ll be worth the investment.

And when will that be? asks a smirking Al.
Just you wait. You know, it’s your solemn duty as main to be beneficiary to all your little counterparts.
I’m sure. I do so enjoy having a bunch of noobs leeching off my hard-earned funds. she answers dryly.
Shhh. She’s going to be a fellow wizard, be kind to her.
Because fire and ice are meant to get along. Whatever you say.

Yes, I intend Nai (in the very distant future) to be an I/L wizard. Let’s hope I get that far.

Pictures will be up shortly, in the meantime I must restart my computer for being stupid. UWOAIOI!