This should be my last blog in a while, guitar lessons end today, from which my bud Denny and I are going to be self teaching via the interwebs. As a quick reminder for any aspiring WoW players or WoW altaholics (I, myself, am an altaholic) – Thunderhorn, Horde, BurnedLight. I’ll be willing to help out with any quest needs. We’ve also got a pretty active Vent.

For any DotA players, AzD.EbilTauren on East, plain ol’ EbilTauren on West. (Yes, I use a Clan Tag. Sue me)

Onward, to the paladin whining!

Blizzard hates paladins.

That covers a lot.

[Holy]

If you’re a healadin, you know how much hell it can be to solo, or even group heal. By yourself, your main attacks are trying to juggle your judgements and seals, all of which, if you’re holy, shouldn’t be too close to your main taskbar. Using holy shock would add some moderate damage, but drain your mana. As I said in my last blog, we also have a lack of viable heal sources, and no HoTs (Heal over Time).

In instances like MgT, paladins aren’t really the greatest of healers, especially for Kael’Thas. Everyone is taking damage during his orb/phoenix phase, and you’re trying to figure out who to heal, priority-wise, while trying to dodge 2000 DPS arcane orbs out to get you, while your resto shammy buddy just threw a chain heal off in his group, ran around, and repeated, maybe tossing some totems down to DPS Kael while he heals. Your priest buddy bubbled and renewed everyone, throwing an occasional big-whopper heal down, and your resto druid friend has just suceeded in taking over the world.

Again.

[Protection]

This is probably Blizzard’s least picked on Paladin. The AoE mobbing capabilities of a Protection paladin are legendary, throwing a sanctuary on themselves, a shield spike, retribution aura, and running into a group of about 6-8 mobs, sometimes up to 15, throwing up a holy shield, minimizing, and enjoying some quality whatever time. (Oh yeah, if you’re prot, you could very well fap off, clean up, grab a snack, come back, and find your pally ready to tackle the next set of mobs). However-there are some major setbacks. While a prot pally can jump into a room and grab enough aggro to blast the instance roof off, the healer is freaking out, spamming heals on him because, out of any tank class, the paladin has the lowest HP. Druids dominate HP with 20K+, a good warrior can hit that too, but a prot pally, if he goes for the stam gear, like the warrior, he loses spell damage, in which he cannot hold aggro and thus fails.

Bubble also drops aggro, which is pretty damn stupid. I mean, if you were fighting someone, and they suddenly grabbed a rock in front of him to shield himself, would you run to his best friend’s house and beat the crap out of him?

[Retribution

Oh boy.

Ohhhh boy.

This is why most people even GO paladin. The concept is, paladins are a fusion of a warrior and a priest, so while your DPS may not be the greatest, and your heals are a little shoddy, you can keep going and going. But no, Blizzard likes to use Retadins (Retardadins, Retnoobs) as toilet paper. Prior to, I don’t really remember, patch 2.X-Ret Paladins needed spell damage and Strength, Agility, Crit Rating, Attack Power, and Agility.

What the hell kind of plate gear offered, or currently offers these? None. Ret Pallies used Jack Sh*t, and usually, they were all out of Jack. Seal of Command depended on spell hit and damage, and seal of blood isn’t too great if you’re OOM and near dead. Horde Pallies have no form of DoTs (Damage over time), so rogues could just vanish if they wanted, or stunbandages could go uninterrupted. Repent is a crap CC (Crowd Control) as any half assed healer will dispell that crud. If a Ret Pally’s mana goes out, his DPS can drop well below average. A ret pally’s burst damage could occasionally pull aggro from a tank, meaning that he’d have to wait before jumping in. On the flipside, any rogue, warlock, mage, hunter, shaman, warrior, priest, druid, or critter could out DPS a ret paladin.

I used to like ret-til’ I figured I wouldn’t get put in any half assed arena team, would be rejected from any raid or instance, and would flat out be shot down.

I should’ve rolled enhance shammy.