The LOST Parody-02

Alright so here’s another installment of The LOST Parodies. Since you guys liked them so much last time, I decided to go ahead and let my mind wander again. Only a few little animals were killed this time, so don’t worry .

Now without further adieu, let the randomness begin!

The Last of Shadow Templars

The company is wandering around the hallways, following the whispers that seem to come from everywhere. They know zombies lurk in the depths of the facility, but the constant silence of human voices starts to play with their minds.

Maldran: Hey stop talking, Felix, you’re making me so angry!
Felix: I’m not talking, moron.

Eerie whispers float through the air.

Mikhail: Hey I think the whispers are coming from over there *points at a door at the end of the corridor*. I want Naz and Lily to come with me while everyone else provides covering fire incase things get dirty. Then, when we…
Felix: Hey what made you boss? There’s no I in team!
Mikhail: There’s no you in team either.
Felix: So if I’m not on the team, and you’re not on the team, then no one’s on the goddam team! The team friggin sucks!

More eerie whispers.

Lily: Shut up you two, we’re getting close. And eyes up, Maldran!
Maldran: Sorry *stares ahead as if his eyes haven’t been wandering*
Nova: I can feel him. Damiver is so close.
Naz: Well, if he’s on the other side of this hatch, then we can’t open it. *Grunts in frustration as he tries to pry the door open*
Nova: You’re a Shadow Templar aren’t you? Use your goddam mind!
Naz: Why don’t you use YOU’RE goddam mind?!
Nova: Fine!

In an instant, Nova blasts the door open, revealing a small room with someone tied to a chair. As the group approaches, they find Damiver gagged and bound. They release him and help him up. Naz, Lily, and Mikhail retreat back down the hallway to explore as the others reunite themselves with Damiver.

Damiver: Nova! I’m so glad to see you!
Nova: Oh, I’ve missed you so much!
Maldran: Me too!
Felix: Shut up, Mal.
Maldran: *gasp* you’re all dirty, Damiver! Here, let me help clean you up… by rubbing you all over.

Meanwhile over with Mikhail and the Shadow Templars…

Mikhail: I have a bad feeling with this, and I’m not even a Shadow like you guys.
Naz: Tell me about it, I’ve had chills running down my spine ever since we’ve gotten here. Feels kind of like when you’re constipated.

Awkward silence

Naz: Or maybe because of the zombies. Yep, that’s why. Zombies. No constipation. Just the zombies…
Mikhail: Right, anyways… Lily how are you doing?
Naz: I’m not constipated!
Lily: I’m fine, but OH MY GOD WHAT ARE THEY DOING!

The three turn around to watch Damiver, Maldran, Nova, and Felix.

Naz: Looks like Maldran’s touching Damiver in places he REALLY shouldn’t be.
Mikhail: Why is he crouched down touching his…
All three: WHOA!

This has been another short production of my mind. Thanks for reading !

11 thoughts on “The LOST Parody-02”

  1. LMFAO
    This is awesome.
    Score one for spontan. . . spontanuity?
    Sorry I’m in a rush and can’t spell.

    ~Lily x33.

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