Dear Santa,

I have been a very bad girl lately, so I thought I’d send you this letter, you know, as an early notification of sorts. Just in case you thought I wasn’t repenting or something and wouldn’t send me that Muffinator I asked for Christmas this year…

I told you already, it wasn’t me that stole all your cookies last year!
And it wasn’t me that stole all ten of your muffins last month either! D<

But oh dear Santa, I really was so, so bad last week.

It started out harmlessly enough: Dern was yelling at his BL to come to the FM right now, and since yeah, I’m in his BL, so I went! So what happened was that he found this specimen of attention whore (oops, bad word!), and wanted us to watch her waxing lyrical about her misery, which went somewhat along the lines of:

something something so many guys love me, I love because hate takes so much energy [aaaangst!], and I had phone s3x with all the guys in my handphone, but not anymore now because I will only *bleep*bad-word!*bleep* the guy I love [oNg, deeeeep pashun!] but I won’t love anyone anymore it hurts too much, and I tear guys’ hearts apart, and hey Dern you used to be my stead too, you would know but I changed steads so very very often cause like, I’m so very desirable, you’ll have to queue to the ends of Mars to get me…

*takes a deeeep breath*
Whoosh.

Surely it can’t be bad to laugh at someone as stupid and weird as that, Santa, right? D:

Then, a couple of days later, Darky got bored, and so did I. Being bored is not considered being bad, right? I mean, I was so completely bored the past couple of weeks too, and I didn’t even bother to train and stuff. So when Devvy said he needed help to transfer the crap out of his mage so that he could use it as a Zombie Map potions mule, I gladly hopped along to the FM, and met up with Devvy and Darky.

Then, while Devvy relogged, Darky decided to strike up a random conversation with the random person in the FM.

(Oh yeah, did you hear about that infiltration of the Bermuda Islands by strange muffin-touting hamsters?

NO, IT WASN’T ME! >O!)

[Congratulations Devvy on his rapid level-ups; I think he’d probably hit 3rd job already or something by the time of publication. XD]

Uh, so Darky started saying to this random person, ‘Hey, are you Devvy? I have a wa14 BWG to return to you.’

What was I to say? Darky started it going first! And when the person said yes, could you blame me for cracking up out loud together with Darky and the guildies over the guild chat?

‘LMFAO HE SAID YES OMG!!’

And hey, we didn’t just prank people. There was this girl that said No, and Darky gave her 50k for being honest. So like, we weren’t being completely evil.

Anyway, we pulled that prank on at least five people. My part was to hang around, take SSes, and make comments like, ‘Please, Devvy, lend it to him for one more week, since you’re so rich anyway!’ and ‘Butbutbut you /said/ you’ll lend it to me after Darky! D:!’

There were so many that said yes, we couldn’t help but feel that they deserved a good round of pranking for being so dishonest.

I wasn’t really being bad, was I? D<

There was this one nasty character who, after grudgingly allowing us to ‘borrow’ the non-existent workglove for another week, and finding out that it was just a prank, started scolding us like we were the ones being dishonest scammers.

Like, what the hell.

Did we say, ‘Give us 100k, and we’ll return you the workglove!’ ?
Did we say, ‘Give us your firstborn or we will NEVAR give you the workglove! Oh, and don’t forget the muffins too!’

Like muffins we did not!

He was the one that thought he could scam two innocent people simply looking to return a valuable object to a friend. He was the one that LIED so that he could get something out it!

(Okay, fine, so both of us kinda ‘lied’ to get a laugh out of it. >>; )

But STILL.

WHAT gave that freaking DISHONEST piece of ROTTEN BROCOLLI the right to go mass defame me and Darky? I was so frigging mad, when my fame kept dropping! I hopped out of the FM immediately, and for that bit of cowardice…

I got insulted by that little bugger!
The insult that he threw my way?

‘No hair’!

How absolutely shocking! What ever will protect my scalp from awful sunburns from this day on, omigosh?!

We pranked a couple more, but that ‘loser guy’, as Darky christened him, was the best catch, albeit that one that had the greatest backlash as well. -_-

I told Darky that the trick was wearing thin, and he was like, ‘Hmm, true. How about a new one? I know! Let’s go proposing to random people!’

‘Hey, want to be my dar? I can buy you cash. I’m going to charge $500 tomorrow. I can buy wedding, rings, clothes, anything you want.’

Note that all that was said to a guy. And Darky’s a guy.

And off we went.

I mean, DARKY went and I FOLLOWED. I wasn’t the mastermind of it all! I mean. I didn’t even think about the damn plan! I only just sat there and laughed along!

And please, Santa, even you would have found it hilarious. Most of the guys that Darky asked went like, ‘I AM NOT GHEY!’ There was this victim that spelt out whole sentence word by word, just to get past the filter, lmfao.

There was this other person that was all confused, and asked, ‘So you’re a girl?’

And there was this guy that actually said okay! ROFLMAO. XD

Then Darky decided that I was having too much fun, and decided that it was my turn to turn on the charm.

I DIDN’T WANT TO DO IT! I was protesting every step of the way! But Darky was like, come on, Silver, go for it! He even lured the hapless victims to me! He was the one that invited the poor girls into the Chat Messenger and trapped them there!

What was I supposed to do other than to carry on with the show! >O!

Ohoh, andand Darky said he would show me how easy it was to get a girl.

He failed. Twice…

XD And like, a couple of days after the pranking spree, one of the girls that I ‘proposed’ to PM’d me, and asked me who I was! XD Luckily she didn’t take offense to the truth of it, ehehe. But oh damn that was so completely funny-

Wait. No! Nonono! I’m really really sorry about doing all this pranking! D:

So. There, you have the confession. T__T I’m contrite and all kinds of remorseful, I really am, Mr Santa. I even tried to make up for it by reporting this drop-gamer-vac-hacker! And he got banned like, minutes after I reported him. XD *victory!*

So could you please please please give me the Muffinator this year? D: D: I’ll be really good forever and ever if you do! I’ll even wear flowers on my head and stuff! D:

Love (and lots of contrite-ness, don’t you forget!)
Silvar

P.S. How did you think about that last picture as a cash outfit? I thought I might as well go overboard with the flowers since I can’t find anything that’s nicely understated…

P.P.S And, uh, Santa? Since I’m on this whole coming clean business, about the disappearing muffins last month… I took nine of them. Nine. The last one Squishy ate, so I really didn’t swipe all ten of your muffins! >O!

P.P.P.S And I want that Muffinator 2.0! Not 1.0; that version sucks bad cause it konks out half the time. D<

P.P.P.P.S And if you don’t give me that Muffinator (2.0, remember!), I’ll make your Christmas not as merry as you’d like it to be, so there! >O!