Y’know, the usual; you liked? Feel free to tell me why. You hated? Feel free to tell me why. You love me and want to bear my children? Uh…I’ll get back to you on that one. >.> I heart all of you who have reviewed, commented and supported me. *throws cookies*

School is slowly re-consuming my life. Piece by slimy piece. So, as a kind of bribe I’m going to be posting a few random pictures along the way. Today, I’m posting the duo I can safely refer to as Team Maestro. These are the original sprites I had when I was in the character-developing stages, just as a visual reference, because I’m a visual-ish person who can’t draw for Esther Shields. <_< Oh yes. And a random doodle I did in class of Al. It’s unrecognizable. I told you, I can’t draw for Esther Shields. ;_;

To Silver: Your chapter is here. xD No need for the spade. Although you might want to get an axe to chop up this writer’s block.

To Indigo: Didja have a good holiday? Yes, I have met Colon. She’s not stupid. =P Oh, and you and Fire can be rivals for the position of Chief Cultist of the Way of Az.

To Fire: See above. XD And I’m sure that if Az was given any sort of worship, he’d lap it up. He might propose to you. Maybe he’d even sign a few autographs…
*backs away from the strip of rawhide-story-that-doesn’t-smell* Um.

I’ve just watched the first movie of Pirates of the Caribbean again and I think Az is a bit like Jack Sparrow. Savvy? And if you get bored waiting for me to update, scan my friendslist and read their stuff, because they’re all brilliant. =D

Yes, I’m shameless and horrible. And this chapter ish crap.
—-
i. Essy
What had I done to make Li so angry at me?

Saedas had warned me from the beginning that there was something really dangerous in me that wanted out. Finesse. I knew that I…was asleep whenever she came out, and I always tended to see that as a kind of escape. At least I wouldn’t really have to face that side of me. But I never imagined that she’d be going after Az and Li. And it was the only real explanation, right? What else could I have done to have made her so…

“Oh, stop blubbering,” Al said curtly, and as I shoved myself up, annoyed, I snapped, “I’m not…blubbering!” She just rolled her eyes at me and walked out, leaving me to tag along, which made me even more annoyed. Finally, I drew up so I was walking beside her and managed in a small voice, “Where’s Saedas?”
“In the clinic,” Al replied, and turned a corner. I paused before realising she wasn’t heading in the direction of the kitchens, and asked, “Aren’t you going to the kitchens? I could-”
“I highly doubt you could do anything right now,” replied Al acidly, and I ran up to her and grabbed her shoulder, catching the tray as it slipped out of her hands.

“Don’t be mean,” I scolded. “What do you mean? I can do everything you can do, and we both know it.” She raised an eyebrow and I protested, “It’s true. Saedas taught me just as well as you.”
“Have you been his apprentice since you were nine years old?” she asked, still keeping the eyebrow raised. Reluctantly, I shook my head. “Are you so close to him you know exactly what a raised eyebrow or a hand movement can mean?” She paused so she could enjoy my loss a bit more, then exclaimed, her voice all fake surprise, “No, that’s right! You haven’t.” Her voice returned to normal as she yanked the tray out of my grip and gave me a cool smirk. “So I think we’ve established that you can’t do everything I can do. Now go find Saedas for whatever you want, and tell him I’m going to be preparing the Eyedrops. Also, you’ve missed the point entirely. While we can both say that your capabilities are null, that wasn’t the point of discussion.”

“What was, then?” I demanded, grabbing the tray back to make her listen to me. She looked at it resignedly, like she was about to torch it, shrugged and replied dryly, “Well, the fact that two of your oldest childhood friends are here should be quite distracting. Oh, yes. If I recall correctly…one is your ex-boyfriend?” She began to walk off, probably to the potions store, and I yelled after her, “What do you mean, ex-boyfriend?! He’s still-”
“Yes, yes, you’ve just had a fight and haven’t talked to each other in over two years,” she called back over her shoulder, and all the sarcasm was seriously oozing off her voice. “I can see a kiss and make up session in the nearby future. Oh, the fact that you tried to kill him might improve matters too.” She stopped, and turned to face me side-on. “Stop being such a naïve kid, Essy. The boy you pined and pined over is a man with his own agenda. Something tells me you’re only on it in the ‘kill list’ section.” I stared after her blankly, not daring to believe her, as she turned back and continued walking.

Doesn’t Az love me any more? He wouldn’t have saved my life if he didn’t love me, would he?
But that was three years ago…
“W-what do I d-do with the t-tray?” I stuttered, but she was already opening the door to the potions store and I fell to my knees in the middle of the corridor. The tray fell out of my hands and the bowl rolled along the corridor for a bit.

A hand landed on my shoulder, and I gasped and looked up quickly, half-expecting it to be Az grinning at me, but it was just Saedas. His face was cool and emotionless, like usual, and I looked back down, fiddling with the wooden spoon.
“Is something the matter, Essy?” he asked softly, and I choked back a sob and wiped my eye on my sleeve. I liked Saedas, a lot, and couldn’t understand why he put up with Al. He deserved a lot better than her. But it was hard for you to believe he actually cared when he never actually showed any emotion.

“I’m…okay,” I mumbled between sobs. “Please, I’m…don’t worry…I’m okay…” He knelt down beside me, careful not to come up on my blind side. Having one eye made you feel really vulnerable sometimes, especially when people kept on the side you couldn’t actually see with unless you turned. His Anakarune rustled slightly as he moved. I gave him a sort of watery smile, but he didn’t look convinced, so I stopped and was trying to find something to blow my nose on before he handed me a handkerchief.
“Azrael?” he murmured, and that name just sent me into another sobbing fit. I guess that was enough answer for him. I was crying insanely, and I didn’t really care if anyone saw me. He just sat next to me while I cried, occasionally handing me another handkerchief. When I had quieted down enough so that I was just occasionally sniffing, I felt him rising, but one hand still reassuringly on my shoulder.

“We will be dining together tonight,” he commented, and I rubbed at my eyes so I could look at him, confused. He didn’t look at me, so I tried to see what he was focusing on. There didn’t seem to be anything in particular, except for a window which was spilling late-afternoon light in pretty patterns across the floor. He had risen and was now walking over to it, even as I tried to see what interested him so much besides me.

I couldn’t have mistaken those two from ages off. Az and Li, going hunting, probably. Li was shaking her Avarice at him and I couldn’t help but smile. They were so much like siblings. Then it hit me, what he was saying, and I pressed a hand to my mouth.
“Oh,” I said blankly, unable to find anything else to say. He nodded at me, as though I had just solved some problem, and I nodded faintly. He turned to leave and I grabbed at him, which made him turn and look back.
“Where are you-”
“There are yet patients to be tended to, Essy,” he answered, face impassive, so I let him go and turned back to the window and watched Az walking out of sight.

There he is, there goes the traitorous son of a Pang. You’ll get your chance tonight, Essy. There are so many dangerous things at a dinner table.
I nearly shrieked as I clapped my hand to my eyepatch, whimpering. No, no, no!
Yes, yes, yes, She mocked. Don’t be soft! He took away three years of your life, waiting for him. He took away your aiming eye, and that’s your ability to shoot straight, gone. He took away your love…
“You aren’t me,” I whispered, shaking my head from side to side. “Go away! You’re not me! You can’t tell me what I have to do!”
I’m you all right, you pathetic moron,, She scoffed, and I rocked, shaken by the force of her hate and disgust. Think. What has he given you? Now Saedas-
“No!” I screamed, increasing the pressure on my face. “I love Az! I love Az!”
Delusional! Romantic! We’ll see how ‘I love Az’ you can be when you kill him. I’ll put you to sleep, right until the moment where you take an eye for an eye. And his little girlfriend, too. She made you angry. It’ll be satisfying, seeing her scared, won’t it?

“Stop it,” I moaned, scrabbling at the strings, my nails scratching my face. “Please don’t. I don’t want them hurt, I don’t…”
Liar, She said, her voice singsong. Stupid lying fool. Yes, yes. That’s right. First I’ll let you watch me killing Az, then watch me killing Li, and you can kill Al yourself. I opened my mouth for some weak protests but she sliced over me, as vicious and angry and happy as a rabid Bain. Oh, don’t think I haven’t heard the thoughts you’ve had about her. ‘She doesn’t deserve him’. ‘He could do better’. ‘Annoying Lycanthrope-natured-’ She paused delicately and I was sobbing again, this time in fear and fury. But she continued, her tone horribly gleeful, Well, well, no shortage of prey. I’ll kill them all with your hands, Essy. Kill them all…with your hands.

ii. Interlude
“He saw you,” the fire wizard remarked to her master, placing a bunch of towels on the floor beside him. The redheaded Priest took his time in replying, helping wrap his last patient, a lost Rogue, in the towels and handing her a cup of the warming red bean soup. Then he got up, rubbing at his forehead wearily, as she glanced around the room. The majority of patients had departed to try and fit in a few hours of rushed hunting before the winter-land’s early sunset.
“There’s none left,” Allamar said, as he sat down on a chair. “You should take a rest, master.” Pulling up another chair, she sat down beside him as her gaze swept over the remaining people in the hall.

“Am I the Priest or are you?” he asked, gesturing. She handed him an orange juice, smiling a smile that others who knew the wizard just as a casual acquaintance would have been surprised to note on her face. Li, for one. “No one knows that better than myself, Allamar.”
“Then practise what you preach,” she replied tartly, and he smiled back as he took it.
“If only it were that easy,” he murmured, lowering the now-empty bottle “What did they say to the invitation?” The wizard’s lips curled into a sort of derisive half-smile.
“Azrael has told me to warn you not to try any ‘funny business’,” she answered, her voice sing-song. “Because he plans to disregard table manners and kill you if you should try anything. It applies to me, as well.” The Priest turned his head so that a curtain of hair blocked her view of his face, but she knew he was smiling.

“So, what say you?” he murmured, rising to his feet. She followed suit.
“I follow whatever you say,” she ventured, and again, that silence hung in the air between them where he didn’t speak, didn’t seem to have even acknowledged what she had said. After ensuring the wounded had all been safely attended to, he led her out of the clinic area to the sitting-room where they spent the rest of their time, the hearthplace cold and silent. He inclined his head at it, and she set the dry wood ablaze with a controlled spell as he lowered himself into one of the significantly more comfortable chairs near it.

“No,” he answered, as she sat in the chair opposite, removing her slippers and folding her legs. “What say you? I want to hear what you believe we should do.”
“What I think is unimportant, master,” she answered, shrugging, and he gave her a measured look which she didn’t meet. Instead, she stared into the fireplace, watching the flames. Finally, he broke the silence with a soft, “Allamar…”
“I don’t have an opinion,” she said blandly. “Whatever you want me to do, I’ll do.”
“I highly doubt that a magician as verbose as you could hold no opinion on this matter,” he replied sardonically, and she couldn’t help but let out a little laugh. Finally, she looked up at him, watching the firelight play across his pale face. The crystal lamp hanging from the ceiling could be lit with an incantation, but neither of them wanted to ruin this atmosphere with something artificial.

“Fine, then,” she remarked, shrugging. “I think that Maestro is chasing shadows. This boy isn’t going to be the one he wants.” Her master appeared to consider this, steepling his fingers before him. Then he asked the loaded question.
“Why?” There were so many reasons that instantly bubbled to the surface. Finally, she replied, “Azrael believes you’re the mastermind behind all this.”
“Then I shall have to disillusion him over dinner,” the Priest said, and she smiled. Her smile vanished when the next thought flickered to the front of her mind.
“What is Maestro going to do then?” she asked softly. “He thinks he has the element of surprise as long as he keeps you as his scapegoat.”

“Believe me, he has already been angered enough over my apparent failure to kill them both,” he answered darkly, and she tensed.
“Did he visit?” she asked, and he just looked at her. She knew the answer the moment their eyes met.
“Son of a werewolf,” she whispered harshly, and something flamed inside her. Not anger; she had long ago used up her store of anger. Something else.

“Sit down.” His voice cut across her emotions, sharp and cold like honed icicles. It was enough to bring her back to earth, and she inclined her head respectfully at him as she subsided. He continued, “He did not hurt me, nor did he threaten me with violence. He simply warned me of his impatience.”
“Which is the same thing,” she replied coolly. “I hardly think Maestro would just come and leave quietly if he was feeling…impatient.”

“Perhaps I taught you too well,” he replied dryly, glancing across at her over his steepled fingers. She relaxed, marginally, as he rang a bell and one of the house servants appeared with wine, made from the eternally-fragrant blue violas of the Deep Forest of Patience. He was right. If Maestro had genuinely intended anything …
“Hardly, master,” she said, leaning forward to pour it as the servant departed silently. Not everyone could be a warrior, or a thief, or a magician, or a bowman. Some never got a chance, others were just…unable. He had taught her not to pity them. A lesson she hardly needed.

“When will you learn to call me Saedas, Allamar?” he asked, interrupting her thoughts, and she just laughed in reply. He posed this question nearly every time they spoke. They both knew the answer. Neither of them bothered to say it. Then she sobered, sliding one of the glasses, filled with the cerulean wine, over to him. He picked it up and began to swirl it gently around, his eyes seemingly fixed on it as it caught the warm light of the fireplace, infusing it with a warm, almost ethereal transparency.

“What will you be accomplishing with tonight?” she questioned, picking up her own glass. He didn’t look away from his drink, and so she continued, “If Maestro visited, then you can’t afford to just manipulate from the sidelines any more.” The moment she finished speaking, he looked across at her sharply, and she knew she had mis-stepped. Lowering her head, she murmured, “It was not my place, master.”
“It rarely is,” he answered, a tinge of amusement in his voice, and she glanced up at him warily. He was smiling, or, at least, the corners of his lips were pointing upwards. At length, he added, “Maestro has dictated which path I am to follow. But he has also forced my hand. A toast, Allamar.” Almost mockingly, he raised his glass.
“To whom?” she asked, following suit.

She nodded when she heard the answer, and leaned across, letting the drinks clink gently together just in the air above the middle of the table.

iii. Az
It was dark when we returned to the house, soaked and covered with scraps of Leatty and Jr. Yeti fur, Jr. Pepe-coloured bruises, and the overwhelming smell of fish. My good mood couldn’t even be ruined by Al, leaning on the doorframe while light and WARMTH spilled out. Warmth; that was something we were currently severely lacking. Also, Li needed a good hot bath. More than usual.
“I see you had fun,” she said glancing over us. “You smell like a Lith Harbour wharf.” Li started forward, probably with the full intention of strangling her, and the fire wizard actually stepped back, waving a hand in front of her face while I caught my savage Kitty-Li and restrained her from getting blood on my clothes.

“Dear Grendel, I can smell you from here,” observed the magician sarcastically. “Please. Go inside and take a curse-forsaken bath. Clothes are provided.” She was just about to walk off and be infuriating and magicianly somewhere else before Li interrupted her. I wondered if the one could exist without the other. Infuriating + Magicianly = Magician.
Magician – Infuriating = Feasible?

“What do you mean, clothes are provided?” demanded Li-kins, taking a step forward. This time, the fire wizard held her ground against the advancing forces of Stink. I couldn’t see how it made a difference, though. Okay, so maybe the kitty-Li didn’t really smell that bad normally. Al was looking us over us carefully; I struck a dramatic pose for her benefit and she switched her gaze back to Li. Obviously the sheer awesomeness of me had been too awesome for her to look at any longer.
“Well, you can’t really expect to appear to dinner in that,” she remarked. “Oh, and if an uncultured pig like you was ever taught any etiquette, I suggest you rehash it now.” With that, she turned and left, leaving us to slink in, or rather, I slunk while Li resisted violent arm spasms. A couple of random servants wrapped us in towels, which were fluffy. The towels, I mean. Not the servants. Wow, they had servants. Although I guess two people couldn’t run a house like this all on their own. No…three.

“Er, sir?” One of them was tentatively shuffling closer, and I looked around to see if they were referring to someone else, but Li was already getting ushered off. So I was a ‘sir’ now. Well, it was an upgrade from ‘sound-like-a-balrog-jabbed-in-the-butt’. However, I was severely let down by his next mumble of, “The bathrooms are this way.” He was, very carefully and inconspicuously, waving a hand in front of his face, and I blinked at him. Surely we didn’t smell that un-spiffy. I inhaled my sleeve and gagged; okay, so maybe we did. Oh, my violated nostrils. How was I ever going to attend wine-tastings again?

“You look radiant,” I observed to Li, as we stood outside the massive, closed double doors. She made a half-hearted effort to punch me in the nose, and failed due to my powers of spiff. The servants were giving us weird looks, so I leaned across and whispered theatrically, “They’re stunned by your radiant beauty.”
“No, they’re amazed that someone can be so idiotic,” she snapped, and I shied in mock-hurt, to straighten by her side as the servants opened the doors for us and we walked in.

It felt kinda surreal, with all the shiny and stuff. In the centre of the shiny room was table with three people sitting at it. I nearly stopped dead when I was struck with the combination of the Priest, seated in place of honour at the head of the table, and the girl on his left side.

Essy.

Placards were neatly placed upon the plate of each setting. Already I knew where I would be. Walking up to Essy, without a word, I picked up mine and switched it with hers so I would be next to the Priest instead, drew out the chair and smiled at her as she got up and reseated herself hesitantly. The patch was purple. This was my Essy. I gave her a gentlemanly smile and she gave me a happy one back, which made me twinge slightly inside. Li made a face, but didn’t protest as she sat down next to the magician, who smirked at her.

I took the opportunity to survey my cutlery. Man, we Bandits didn’t even go through this many knives in their lifetime. Lavender hair swung into my general field of vision, and Essy whispered, “Start from the outside and work in.” I looked up at her, and she winked at me, adding quickly under her breath, “Don’t worry. If you get it wrong, Saedas won’t mind.” Saedas. I met the hazel eyes over the table, his head casually resting on his interlaced hands.

I’ll remember your name, Priest, I mouthed, willing him to hear my thoughts. Remember mine as I drag you down to Hell with me.

Without breaking the staring contest, he raised one hand and a bell rang somewhere. Within moments servants were carrying up a huge, steaming tureen, but I barely paid attention as they got about the whole business of serving.
“Azrael,” he said, seeming to taste the name, and my fists tightened by my sides. My concentration was broken by the clink of a soup-filled bowl in front of me, and I turned to see Essy, looking at me worriedly. I grinned at her a bit forcedly; she didn’t seem to notice as she looked across at Saedas, which wrenched. He just nodded, and she began eating, with the typical Essy delicacy that made her so…sweet.

The aperitif passed in silence before Essy finally broke the awkwardness with a little, “Az? Could you please pass the salt?”
“Why, to be sure, my fair lady,” I drawled. Catching the salt up in one hand, I juggled it awhile before sending it spinning, caught it upside-down behind my back and plonked it right way up next to Essy. She laughed, which made me grin, which made Li in turn roll her eyes and exclaim, “You never pass up the chance to show off, do you?”
“He hasn’t changed a bit,” exclaimed Essy warmly. “Remember him stealing apples from Roger’s garden?” I winced exaggeratedly and, in a pained whisper, managed, “That incident was supposed to be a sworn secret, ladies.”
“And I suppose that telling Nina who broke into her house and ate Sen’s mushroom soup wasn’t a sworn secret,” hissed Li. “Trust you!”
“Like all sensible women should,” I said, straightening. “But you’ve never been that sensible. If you were sensible, you wouldn’t be you.” I ducked the flying butter knife and it rebounded off a crest-of-arms behind me, dropping to the floor with a clatter. That set Essy into quiet giggles, myself into near-hysterics and Li into seething, embarrassed silence. For a while, anyway.

We continued all like this throughout the entree, while the magicians talked quietly to each other, apparently apathetic to the impending doom of their dining room. At one point, when I tuned in, I heard the wizard say something about her mother and Saedas reply with an expletive that I made a sworn oath on the spot to learn and use more frequently. Seconds later, I heard Li use the same word to describe my table manners, so I replied in context.

There did seem to be a lot of flying cutlery tonight, now that I was thinking about it…flying cutlery. Air-propelled, evil flying cutlery which wanted to spear me dead, commanded by the Evil Scary Li-kins of Doom. A cutlery army. With legs, wielding pepper-shooters so they could take over the whole of the world as we knew it. Then the world would be like one giant dining-table with no table manners.

The main course arrived, which seemed to be some kind of thick meat which I carefully prodded with a fork.
“It’s not polite to pick at your food,” Al said, and I looked up at her.
“It’s not polite to have your elbows on the table,” I replied cheerfully, and she smiled icily in reply. I made little waving motions as I saw Li’s fork hand raise, and then Saedas said, without looking away from his plate, “Dinner is supposed to be a peaceful affair. Cease and desist.” Grudgingly, Li lowered her fork, which infuriated me beyond measure, for some reason. I think it was just the potential sight of a fork sticking out of the Priest’s forehead that amused me.

The first chance I got, I would sink my cutter into his throat. Watch him tell me everything I needed to know. Why he had wreaked havoc with my memories and my life for three years.
“You can’t expect it to be a peaceful affair after what you did to me,” I said tersely, my voice harsher than I’d intended. Essy’s eyes widened and Li’s throwing arm seemed to move slightly, but I shook my head at her and she nodded back, turning to glare at Allamar with a kind of ‘pull-anything-and-I-inflict-doom-on-you’ look.

“The serious conversation may be reserved for dessert,” Saedas answered mildly, meeting me straight in the eyes. He looked almost disinterested, and that disturbed me. Because from what I’d seen of this Priest, if he didn’t appear to be worried, it was all part of some tactic aimed at me.
“Az, calm down,” whispered Essy, placing a hand on my arm. That would have stopped me before, but now?

I stood up, and Allamar was, in her turn, rising, before Li slid a steak knife under her chin. I knew it would come down to this. I knew it would be me against him, Li and myself against them all-
“Az, I can’t let you do this,” warned Essy, her voice slightly hysterical as she pointed, with shaking hands, a…set of salad tongs at me as the chair scraped out behind her. I wanted to ask her if it was a joke, wanted to tell her that this was serious, before it hit me that she was completely serious.
“I can and I will,” I answered quietly. Al was smiling at Li, an odd, twisted little smile. But Li was good. She could handle anything this magician hurled her way. It was my turn to make a stand.

My turn to say what I never had the chance to say.

“Essy,” I began softly. “I…I was the one who did this. I left you, and because of that I can never honestly say that I did my best. But he…” I glared at the magician, who was just watching me, coldly, expressionlessly, and his lack of reaction was what pushed me on. “He was the one…who made me believe you were dead. If I’d known you were alive, I never would’ve…” I swallowed, and the sound of the salad tongs falling with a clatter on the tiles was loud to my ears.

Then Essy whirled on Saedas, her one eye blazing, hissing at him. She was more Finesse than Essy at that moment. It was slightly gratifying, seeing her turn on the man who had caused all this misery.
“You manipulated me!” she cried, her hands groping amidst her cutlery. “You never told me about this, you never-”

What I saw next was enough to stop the rising triumph I felt at Essy’s indignation. Li’s steak knife thumped onto the heavy tablecloth, and Al’s chair fell back with a loud clunk as she stood abruptly. ‘Cold’ did not do justice to her expression. It was dangerous, silent, glacial. Mirroring mine. “Excellent,” Saedas said laconically, apparently not seeming to care about what had caught our attention so vividly. “There is more to this than you would ever believe possible, Azrael. Now sit down and be silent. All of you. Lest we are at each other’s throats before the games have even reached their climax.” Neither Li nor I responded, but Essy sat down, while Al said, her voice forcibly controlled, “I thought you said he hadn’t hurt you.”

“Sometimes a lie is required for the truth to be revealed,” Saedas answered, and without another word, the wizard righted her chair and sat down, her eyes fixed on him.
“What in the twice-cursed, thrice-damned name of the Dark Lord is going on?!” Li growled, and I could feel myself sliding darker, deeper, colder.
“My sentiments exactly,” I said, hearing the ice slough off my voice. Essy whipped around to face me, and I saw fear flit across her face. I wasn’t surprised, although it was a punch in the gut to see her…afraid of…me. No; not even. In this vale of ice where I had locked myself, there was no pain, no happiness, no surprise. Everything was there, and it was only up to you what you saw and what you refused to see.

But my main attention was never diverted from the inflamed, bloodstained word sliced into Saedas’s arm as he restraightened his sleeve.

“Talk,” I said dangerously. My shinkita wasn’t here, but I didn’t need it to hit the Priest until he was cross-eyed.
“I said that there was more to it,” he answered silkily, his hazel eyes never leaving mine. “But when did I ever give you the impression that I would be willing to reveal this ‘more’?”
—-
Bleh. ._. OWMG TIHS CHAPTAR IZ TEH SUX0RZ. But I say this all the time. So ignore me. Sorry this chapter is so late: school sucks, and so do writer’s block and the Typo Bug. My English is deteriorating, and so are my mental capacities. Which reminds me. I have a backlog of Math to catch up on. RAR CALCULUS SUX.

=3. ~<3