Thank you VERY much for all the feedback you guys have given me – I’ve been having a bit of trouble with my keyboard as of late so please feel free to point out any errors in spelling/punctuation/whatever you can note. I hope you’ll like this chapter just as much, despite however much I think it sucks as well. xD Just ignore me from now on.

A/N (Author’s Note): This is completely random, but I love writing Az’s POV. It’s fun to take a walk through a warped mind sometimes and see what you come up with.
And, Indigo…you’re right, I have no idea what a squffie is. Please enlighten me. =O

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i. Az
I woke up, or at least, stopped dreaming of the giant fluffy purple Lorangs, and squirmed around in bed. Wait a second, bed? When was there a bed there?

Oh, wait. Why had I been unconscious, even? I remembered the part where I hallucinated about the burgers coming to life and eating me, but I think that was just the bubbling slime. No; after that. That magician, and…then that fighter. The fighter lady with the huge-as-all-Zakum-axe. And-

I groaned and rolled over, pulling the sheets over my head. Finesse. Poor Essy’s legacy had come back to haunt me again…but how? And why? I rubbed at my eyes and opened them; I was in a room. With really heavy curtains. I wondered how long I’d been unconscious for, and pulled open the curtains to check.

All right. So it was daytime. Bright daytime. Really, really, bright mid-afternoon daytime; I was still seeing black spots in front of my eyes. I could actually feel my eyes bleeding from the sheer power of LIGHT, or maybe those were just tears of pain. Either way, my eyes had been fried by the LIGHT…maybe I should become a vampire. But they had that ridiculous accent. I vant to suck your blood. That was clichéd. I hated clichés. They made angels cry. The story angels, I meant. I wondered if there was an angel outside the window blinding me with its awesome brightness.

Eventually, I turned away from the curtains and the angel outside the window – who I waved at – and blinked. Not because of the light, though. Because of the, uh, lady resting on one side of the bed. I grinned and ruffled her hair as she lay with her head on her arms, snoring slightly, and made a mental note to tease her about it when she woke up. Maybe she had washed it last night. I picked up a strand and ran it through my fingers a couple of times; I loved it when she washed her hair, because then I didn’t have to pretend I had no sense of smell. Plus, it felt nice. She’d probably kill me if she heard me say it, though, and threaten me with something painful.

“Y ewub izah yublaying,” she said. I think that’s what she said. I couldn’t tell, her head was buried in her arms. I decided to reply in kind, just to annoy her.
“Eek oheeonty, igunt ugerstandju,” I answered, and she lifted her head and glared at me.
“I meant to say, my hair is not your plaything.” She sat up straight and my hand was left floundering aimlessly. I pulled it back, looking pained, and said, “And I was saying to speak coherently. I couldn’t understand you.”
“I couldn’t understand you either,” she said, glaring at me. “How long have you been awake for?”
“A couple of minutes. See? My eyes got fried by the LIGHT,” I answered, pointing at my eye. She just gave me a disgusted look and said, “Pity, I was hoping a whack to the head might change your ways for the better.”

“Speaking of which, is this another hallucination?” I asked, looking around. “I’m pretty sure that hard road doesn’t magically change into beds overnight.”
“Nah, some rich recluse magician’s helping us out. Her name’s Allamar. If she hadn’t saved your life, though….” She made a little sound at the back of her throat and I looked at her. Then I poked her in the nose and said, “Awww. Someone made my ickle Li-kins angwy. Tell me who they are, widdle Li-kins. I’ww go make em say sowwy.” She yelled, “Hey! I’m not a baby!” and punched me in the shoulder, adding, “I don’t know why I bother with you.”

“Because I bring a ray of sunshine to your bleak and boring life,” I said, leaning over to pinch her cheeks; she pulled back and gave me the Look of Death. I mock-cringed.

There was a thump at the door and she turned around, while I looked up. It was a warrior, dressed in a somehow-familiar black jangoon skirt. She was wearing a pink headband and staring at me like I’d grown horns; I patted around my head and face just to make sure I hadn’t become horrifyingly deformed while I was unconscious.
“I thought I killed you!” she said, pointing at me, and the voice clicked.

Oh, snap! Psycho fighter chick!

She continued with, “Well, I’ll kill you this time!” and her hands went to the huge weapon on her back. Mine went for my shinkita, only it wasn’t there. Big ‘Oh snap!’
“Just you try it,” growled my Ickle Li-kins, and stood, hand going for her Steelys. Suddenly, I saw a flash of red robe at the door, and as the Fighter went for her axe, a voice from the door said, “What did I tell you about not getting in my way?”

Psycho Fighter Chick, as I would call her for the rest of my life, lowered her axe and turned around, confused, allowing me to get a look at another of my would-be saviours. It was a magician in a red Moonlight, one Fire Arrow casually raised straight at the Fighter-girl’s pink-bandanna’d head. Probably my benefactor.
“But, Al! He was the one we-” The magician extinguished the arrow lightly and, smiling sardonically, actually grabbed this Fighter by the ear and yanked her out of the room, squealing.

ii. Li
I didn’t realise my mouth was open until Az started making little buzzy noises. Then I closed it with a snap and willed him to explode in a sudden burst of lightning. Him and Allamar both. What in the Dark Lord’s name was that crazy wizard thinking? Whose side was she on anyway? I turned to him and said, “Stay here.” I was about to leave the room before, as an afterthought, I turned around and added, “You’re resting. Get out of bed and I’ll stab you in the face.” Almost as soon as the words were out of my mouth he was making as if to throw off the blankets, and I snarled, “You’re resting! Understand?!”
“Yes, mother,” he said, the obedient effect only spoiled by the huge mocking grin spread from one side of his face to another. I rolled my eyes at him and concentrated as I turned invisible, Dark Sight masking me as I crept down the hallway.

“I can’t believe this! You traitor! We’re supposed to be doing our job here, whose side are you on anyway?” the fighter girl was screaming at Allamar.
“Aren’t you just all brawn and no brains? You’re the kind of person who gives warriors their bad name, Deya,” the magician answered coolly, and that was one question answered. Allamar was permanently Necki-tongued, not just to people she’d just met.
“But…but Maestro said…” She was actually stammering, and I could sympathize with her. Almost. Anyone who was on the receiving end of that damn magician’s forked tongue would have been deserving of my pity; if they hadn’t tried to off one of my friends. And who by the Lava Dungeon was Maestro? Another problem?

“Maestro isn’t my master,” Allamar said dryly. “And now you’ve gone and utterly ruined it. Shut your mouth before you do any more damage.”
“You’re not my boss!” protested the fighter – Deya? “You can’t tell me what to do-”
“Correction. I find it perfectly within my rights to instruct someone of lower intelligence. Attempting to kill someone face-to-face is not the best way to earn your way into their good graces, especially if their vengeful lover is watching.” I really wanted to just burst into that room and kick in that…that magician’s smug face. There was nothing I would have liked better at that moment. Even my permanent state of annoyance towards Az was eclipsed by this.

“She’s not his lover! What about F-” There was a sound like a crash of glass and a shriek; I hoped someone had gotten injured. Preferably Allamar, but hey, I’d settle for either.
“Really, how many times do I have to repeat myself? If you have nothing intelligent to say, don’t say it. Get out.” I flattened myself against the wall, concentrating on Dark Sight so I would remain unnoticed if the Deya girl stormed out in a fit of rage or something.
“This is our safe house! I have more right to be here than those sneaky little thieves!” I winced at the sheer volume of the Fighter’s yelling. Once she became a Crusader I wouldn’t like to be in hearing distance of her Shout. “If Maestro hears about this-”

Even though Deya could have beaten anyone for sheer volume, I still had to give reluctant points to Allamar for pure nastiness value. Her voice just cut clear across the Fighter’s ranting, shutting her up quickly, the words enough to smash someone’s self-esteem. With a baseball bat. And then stomp on it until it was sludge, then burn the sludge. Then defile the ashes and feed them to snails.
“What can Maestro do, hmm? You think that he’ll put the opinion of one of his weakest and stupidest followers before his second-in-command’s? Get out before you embarrass him any further. I wouldn’t want to think he’d been scraping the bottom of the barrel lately for recruits, but, sadly…” She just let the words hang in the air, and then the door flew open with an almighty crash. I froze and stood there, still, as the Fighter stormed past me, down the corridor. I tailed after her to make sure she didn’t try to kill Az again, because I was the only one allowed to do that. But she just walked past his room, out the front door, slamming it as she went. I let go of Dark Sight and was about to go back to Az’s room, to tell him that we had to get out of here, before I noticed a bluish flash out of the corner of my eye and winced. A magician’s teleport.

Dread rising like a cloud of Stirges in my stomach, I turned around, expecting to be met with a Fire Arrow between the eyes. Nothing; Allamar was just standing there, arms folded, a faint, mocking smile on her face.
“Until your loverboy gets back on his feet, you can stay here,” she said, apparently not seeming to care that I had just overheard the…conversation…between her and the Fighter who had nearly killed Az. My fist twitched. I stuffed it in my pocket and fiddled with the stuff there until I was calm enough to say something else beside a string of insults.
“No,” I snapped. “No way. He’s not my loverboy, and I’m not staying in a house full of…nutjobs who’re going to kill us the moment our back’s turned. Me and Az are getting out of here, and-”

“Az and I,” she corrected coolly, and I actually had to fight my throwing arm, which seemed like it was about to take on a life of its own and fly up to break her teeth in. “Think for a moment…Li. I helped save his life when I could easily have poisoned him. I stopped Deya from killing him just now. I don’t frankly care if you overheard that conversation. Doesn’t that tell you something, or are you still too idiotic to understand?” I seethed. She had saved Az’s life, big deal; her sheer annoyance factor made the debt off, from my perspective.
“You’re not on our side, but you’re not on Deya’s or Maestro’s, whoever they are,” I replied angrily. Her eyes narrowed slightly at the mention of the names, but nothing else. Annoyed, I shot her a few more questions. “Whose side are you on then? How can I be so sure that you won’t try to kill us yourself?”
“How many times do stupid people need things repeated to them before they understand?” she sighed. “I serve my master and only my master. What Deya and her boss want is irrelevant.”

I stared at her suspiciously, and muttered, “Somehow I seriously doubt that.”
“You can walk out that door if you want,” she said coolly. “Go ahead. Although I think you’ll find that a quayside bench isn’t half as comfortable as any of the beds here.” I blinked; surely she wasn’t so stupid as to leave out the accommodation for hire?
“What about inns and hostels, huh?” I asked, hoping to wipe the smirk off her face. “I bet they’d give us a room.”
“I think you’ll find that every inn and hostel in town is booked out at present. Apparently, around this time of the year a lot of glowing fish come up from under Ossyria to around Lith. A very popular tourist attraction.” With those three sentences, delivered in the coolest and most infuriating of voices, she walked past me back down the corridor. I turned around and yelled at her, “Fine! I’m staying here until Az gets better, and only until then! If you try and double-cross us, I swear I’m going to stick these Steelys in your head and see how well your high-intelligence brain works then!”

“Please, do try,” she remarked, not even bothering to look back at me as she continued walking. “It’s been a while since I’ve had assassins on my trail.”

Fuming, I stormed back to Az’s room, where I stopped dead in the doorway at that familiar expression. He grinned at me and said, “So, do we get free breakfast too?” I lost it and let fly a few knives; he blocked them with his cutter and commented, “I’m sure she’s rich enough to pay for a humble meal for two.” I ran over to the bed and tried to throttle him before he grabbed my wrists and wrestled me to the floor; I scowled up at him and said, “Fine. If you get stabbed at your sleep, I’m not mourning for you.”
“Stabbed in my sleep? What, for making a simple request of not wanting to die of starvation?” He leaned over and put his shinkita carefully against the headboard, then bent down and said in a low voice, “What did you really learn?”
—-
Joy! Sorry I’m a bit late with this chapter, I’ve been busy setting up my new scanner/copier. I FINALLY GOT ONE YAY!

…I’m just ranting…irrelevantly…

Will our double-dealing magician be the backstabber who brings down our thiefly duo? Will the Fighter return for Az? Will Li ever get to punch Allamar in the face? Will the villains get their comeuppance? Find out…next time.