I gave up trying to become President because it’s obvious that people would rather have a huge stone monster as President then me. So I went for the next best thing: becoming a ruler by force.

Me and my team of highly trained people that knew the phone number to some ninjas called some ninjas for me. I had them take over the Nexon building in Korea and change my job to Overlord. An Overlord has only one job: Supreme Overlord and comes with skills that are more more important then some HP recovering skill. They are-

Disable: Makes the selected target unable to speak, or do anything else such as walking or using skills. It is best used on protesters and annoying monsters such as a Jr. Boogie.

Construction: Create a new map with specific monsters and backround.

Massacre: Ban all players and kill all monsters on the map and disable respawning of monsters for 1 day.

Law: Creates a law and the new ‘laws’ sub-menu for all characters.

Immortality: You cannot be damaged by skills, weapons, broken potion bottles, or anything else.

Lucky Shot: All attacks kill anything in one hit.

I made a few new maps that everyone will enjoy.

The Chamber of Hopelessness: This is basically a copy of Maple Island (now called Gore Island Jr) but with scary backgrounds, no NPCs or buildings, and only red snails. If you break a law or die you are sent here and must wander around blindly forever. You cannot use skills, but your ability points are saved. Your inventory is also wiped out and given to your Overlord. The only weapon you can use is a club. Tough break for Mages.

The Palace of Gore: This is where your Overlord lives. You can enter it, but I am allowed to kill you if you do. And the Overlord is immortal so don’t bother trying to kill me. Not that you would want to. You can also swim in the moat if you would like to. I enjoy watching people jump in then figure out Maplestory characters can’t swim.

Arena: This is a PvP zone. Mages are pretty much hopeless since they don’t have much HP. When you die you are dead permanently. There are also pressure plates scattered throughout the arena. If you step on one, you will die and they are invisible. Have fun luring Tiger into a pressure plate then laughing as all of his hard work is destroyed as he kills snails for the rest of his life. Unless you die before that happens.

These are some of the laws that I have passed-

-Being a noob is against the law. You are a noob if you beg, use the world “plz” or made a megaphone that questions someone’s sexuality.

-Trying to become Overlord is against the law. You cannot attempt to kill the Overlord, marry him so that you become Overlord when he dies (never), having an election of any kind, or creating a loophole in the laws.

-Tax is now 10 times as much as before because the Overlord needs to be able to buy things that he doesn’t need so he can throw it away.

-Stealing is against the law unless it is the Overlord who wants to steal from you.

-Megaphones are now in the Overlord-only section of the Cash Shop. He can gift them to you but it will cost you $50 USD so that people make useful magephones.

-Drop games/scams are allowed. It is your fault if you fall for them.

-Monsters are now allowed to enter towns and shops so that Maplers cannot be AFK. The Cash Shop can now only be accessed when you are not logged in.

-The names of the islands are now as followed: Gore Island (Victoria Island), Gore Island Jr (Maple Island), Boring Land (Orbis), Legometropolis (Ludibrium).

– Gore Island Jr can now be accessed by all players so that beginners won’t feel left out.

-It is against the law to kill a summoning bag unless the Overlord wants it to be killed.

-Summoning bags can now be purchased in all stores.

-GMs can not do anything but summon Crimson Balrogs in the Free Market.

-All players can purchase character insurance. You get .1% of the money you deposited back if you player is hacked.

-It is against the law for Archers to stand in one spot and shoot arrows.

-You must now choose your class when you make your character. The game will automatically assign you skill points and AP points so that new players don’t get confused and there is no diversity.

-5% of your experience will be given to the King, although he doesn’t need it.

-Stupidify points will not be given to anyone that spells a word incorrectly. The amount depends on level and decrease your experience.

-It is against the law to use the words “radical”, “surfs up”, “kewl”, or “tubular”.

-Any high level that goes to the Henesys Hunting Ground to kill monsters will become a level 10.

-The Party Quest will be removed so people can spend more time training.

-There will only be one guild called the “Overlord Followers”. The Overlord will be the leader and everyone else will be members, also called Peasants.

-While in the Chamber of Hopelessness you can submit an appeal to the Overlord and if I’m bored I’ll read it.

-Random people will be chosen every day to pay the Overlord a “privilege to pay the Overlord” tax.

I’ll also have one lucky prisoner of the Chamber of Hopelessness document everything that happens in my life. Then I’ll hire another guy to take out all of the boring stuff so that I can blog about it here. So for now you can go back to worshiping your Overlord as I go play video games.

And by the way, I was wondering something. Why do aliens always have better technology then humans? Why can’t we ever be the advance civilization that some aliens encounter while they are still in the bronze age and we go there and own everyone there.

Like in the game Halo, the covenant were way more advance then us. They already had these sleek warships that shot plasma while we were stuck with our weird pelican ships. And in the movie War of the Worlds those aliens were so advance that they had already dug under our planet and hid there for millions of years while we were still monkeys.

Aliens are the worst.