LIFE IN THE TRENCHES CHAPTER TWO

“Is that a Mana Wyrm in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?” winked Azanith. (See /flirt for female Blood Elf.)

Arladerus coughed. “Anyways. LOOK OVER THERE! I’M CHANGING THE SUBJECT!”

Azanith didn’t flinch at all.

“INCONSPICUOUSLY!” added Arladerus. After an awkward pause of 30 seconds, Arladerus knew that it failed. “Ahem, anyways, you need to train now. You’re only level 30 and you need to become a Priest so you can buff me. So, where shall we go?”

Suddenly, FunnyFroggy appeared from nowhere and said, “How about a cheap hotel room?” Then, as quickly as he appeared, he burst into smoke.

Arladerus and Azanith used Nearest Town Scrolls and returned to Leafre. “Maybe we should talk to Spinel and go to the Mushroom Shrine? I heard the experience is pretty good there,” said Azanith.

“That’s a good idea. Let’s go!”

Seconds later, they realised they were not in Leafre anymore. However, they were not at the Mushroom Shrine either. They looked around. They were in an enclosed box of rock and dirt. On one side, there was a base, with red markings. On the other side, there was a similar base, except with red markings. Suddenly, a man in blue armour came up.

“Hey mister, do you know where we are?” inquired Azanith.

“Why, you’re standing on a rock!” responded the man.

“… Sir, what is your name?”

“My name is Michael J. Caboose! But you can call me Caboose!”

“Uhh, ok Caboose. Do you know how to get out of here?”

“Yes I do! Just look behind you.”

Arladerus and Azanith turned around, and saw a giant aircraft. Arladerus felt stupid for not noticing it, for he looked to his front, left, and right, but not to his back. “Let’s gooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!” screamed Caboose, as he ran into the ship. Arladerus and Azanith followed him to the cockpit.

“Caboose, do you know what you’re doing?” He was pressing buttons, seemingly professionally.

“Nope.”

“WHAT?!?!”

The ship lunged forward, and looked like it headed for the rocks that surrounded the area, but instead, the air around turned blue right before they hit. However, it was not a smooth ride, for Azanith fell and accidentally landed on top of Arladerus, facing each other. Thoughts rushed back into Arladerus’s head. “What is this I feel on my chest…?” Azanith, blushing, moved her head closer to Arladerus’s. She inched towards his lips. She was almost ther-

“BOW CHIKA BOW WOW!” screamed Caboose. Azanith and Arladerus both turned their heads towards him, screaming,

“CABOOSE!”

“Sorry. Tucker taught me.” Azanith, realising the mood was broken, jumped off of Arladerus. Arladerus got up quickly after, and headed to the cockpit. He was confused by all the colours and buttons. He randomly picked a button, which was the ONLY red button.

“Hmmm…” *push*

“Ahh, it’s good to be back!” Suddenly, Arladerus and Azanith realised that this was not in any town. It was actually Someone Else’s House. A faint moaning sound could be heard in the distance… They followed that sound, and Azanith pulled out her Maple Scanner. They entered a washroom…

In the tub, was a female. The scanner came with information instantly.

DEE32693
HORNY
2 FAME

Caboose ran out of the room, scared and scarred. However, Arladerus and Azanith saw what dee was doing…

She was “playing” with a rubber ducky.

DUH DUH DUH DUH! (Play TLoZ music again) You’ve gained another erection!

“GODDAMNIT.”