I’m sure all of us have thought about it. I’m sure most of us think about it. I’m definetly sure we question ourselves about it.

As we progress and level as the days go by, we all still have that need to get stronger. That certain craving of power that possibly leveling would give. But really, I just end up thinking about it everytime no matter how much I level, and how much stronger I become…

Am I living up to the expectations of my class? Am I as strong as the next guy ahead? Or am I still as weak as I was last level?

The very thought is flawed because no matter how much you level, there’s always someone better. That may or may not apply to the Top 5 of GMS, but we never know.

I keep telling myself that I’m as strong as I am and that’s good enough, however I feel that its only a lie for me. I keep going on and on about how great I can become, and how much more better I can be and do. Yet in the end, I keep feeling I haven’t learnt a thing about being a Ranger. Hell, I’ve got Strafe, I’ve got Puppet, I’ve got Arrow Rain, I’ve got Inferno, but am I really anymore better than the Ranger above me? I’ve been told that comparing is a bad thing. It probably is, but how else do we know that we’ve improved if we don’t compare?

Taking note of how well we do on our own should be its own reward, yet that doesn’t completely satisfy my thinking. Perhaps I’m slowly drifting away from my original intentions, which would be “Be the best Ranger I can possibly become”.

I’ve lost sense of my goals and became practically engulfed in becoming some powerful Mapler. It’s not the way one should think! I lost sense of that, big time. And now, I can only blab on and on about it…

Now I ask, what makes a person hunger for such power? what caused me to have a thirst for greatness? Heck, I’m not sure anymore. It was probably a mix between the fact that I was a priest and I’ve never been able to do anything at all really. I was “The weak Priest” that couldn’t even outdamage a 7x Hermit or something. And because I was always wishing I was stronger.

I remember when I was 5x, I just had a simple ambition of just accomplishing Ranger. Now that ambition became a thirst for power. Boy I feel like an idiot.

Today it took me 4 deaths to realize that I’m not suppose to be better than the other Ranger, sure old habits will come back somehow, but my best bet is to conquor them slowly right?

For the readers, thanks for reading. This was entirely a load off my mind. xP

For everyone; Leveling simply to be better than the guy ahead or behind you isn’t right. Point is to level and be satisfied with what you’ve accomplished. By Simply being better, you only delude yourself of the truth. The truth that someone will always be better. So just be the best you can. Don’t forget that. No one is judging you, if they do, shame on them! You can only be as good as you can be.

Don’t live up to expectations. There are even times when your own expectations are high. Be glad you’re doing whatever damage you do and be glad of the level you are. Don’t let the fact that someone will always be better than you stop you from simply leveling.

Thanks for reading.

SplitStrafer. Ranger of Broa.