Woe is Joe.

Once upon a time, in a land far far away, there lived a slime named Joe. He was an orphan slime, adopted by a wicked stump and had two wicked step-snail sisters named Tom and Debbie. Joe was usually the target of their mean jokes and rude comments.

“I want to be beautiful!” said Joe.

Suddenly, three fairies appeared right before his eyes. They introduced themselves all as Ben. The first Ben wanted to go to the ball, but the second Ben protested and wanted to go shoe shopping. The third Ben shushed them all and prodded Joe to say something.

“I want to go to the ball!” said Joe.

The Bens grinned and flashed their wands. A shining light engulfed the amazed slime and when he opened his eyes, he was a beautiful snail!

“Take me to the ball!” said Joe.

With another flick of their wand, they brought themselves to the location of the ball.

“I want to dance with the prince!” said Joe.

A dazzling young snail made his way towards Joe and bowed. “I’m MC Hammer!” Joe smiled exquisitively at the prince and batted his eyelashes. They began to dance when the royal prince realized that Joe was a he-snail and ran away.

“Will no one ever love me?” said Joe.

Running as fast as a snail could, he tried to get back home, but he saw his stepmother and his wicked stepsisters being attacked by a pig!

“I will save you!” said Joe.

He heroically chased away the pig.

“Hooray!” cheered the stump and the snails.

“m3z4rzz plsssssssss”

“Uh oh.” said Joe.

The bald noob flailed his arms menacingly and attacked the unsuspecting monsters.

“lulzzz exp 4 meeee”

Woe is Joe.

——————————–

Don’t ask.